September 18 preparations 

October 31 is when the big one comes .Halloween is fucking huge here . I wanna say it’s bigger than Christmas but I havn’t got there yet .Your shops are advertising , supermarket aisles are full of it and speciality pop up shops are rolling out . It’s going to be fascinating. The yanks go all out on this one . It’s hard to know why , but when it comes to bullshit they’ve got a good handle on it .Theres not another culture on the face of the planet that embraces the dead and all it’s myths . Our kids are already fighting about who they want to be on the big day . This is where I come into it .As you might of gathered I’m not tethered to political correctness, we’re no bed partners . Last year I was howled down by Emma and a couple of the other school mums when I revealed my costume for the school fundraiser. Going as the Taliban with assault rifle and suicide vest to the St. Macartans ‘T’ party was deemed highly inappropriate. I would bring the school and our family into disrepute. I eventually relented when the campaign ‘against ‘included the confiscation of bedtime activities. This time around I have come up with a brilliant costume plan for the boys . An absolute lolly spinner . Emma is once again horrified and is worried that this idea could backfire big time . No , I say , this is the perfect partnership between two boys that love to niggle each other.Tex is going to be Donald Trump and has already ordered his mask . Getting  Leroys outfit is going to be a lot harder . I havn’t been able to find any Kim Jong -Un outfits yet , but it’s early days . Once I get that I’ve somehow got to get him to look like a Korean beachball and then we’l have the Supreme Leader .I ‘l make up a paper mâché rocket with the USA painted on its point and then we’l be set for a real horror show . The Yanks are gonna love it and both boys are keen as shit on a stick . Tex is a natural Trump , he knows who number 1 is and Leroys the perfect Kim Jong -Un , the little guy who shit stirs the big brother.Perfect.The two craziest leaders in the world as dress ups is brilliant , if I must say so myself . Emma thinks I’ve lost the plot and fears that a little Trump an Kim Jong might not make it home alive . Fuck , what’s the matter with her ? They’re gonna love it , they won’t be offended , surely not . Don’t take this idea off me , not a 2nd time . No it’s going to go down well …….. I think?