A day of 1sts

Leroy came home and said , “guess what dad “? He had a big smile on his face . I thought shit he’s won something . ” I did something I haven’t ever had to do at school before”. “What did you do ?” I asked . “Well , I tried my best but I couldn’t hang on . I had to run as it nearly slipped out on me . ” “Yeah ” , I said . “I did my 1st ever poo at school “. We both started laughing . “They’re you go Leroy , for that you can come and watch Dad turn it on in softball tonight “. Of course I’m catcher and last to bat .Its my turn to bat and at last I’m in the game . Leroy stands behind the fencing to watch his old man play competitive sport for the 1st time . I choke up on the bat ( bring your hands up towards the barrel , apparently it helps you connect , seeing as I can’t hit it ). I tink it straight to the pitchers feet. I bolt ,but half way I’m shot in the back of the leg . By the time I slow down I’m crippled . Everyone is laughing as they know the old mans just torn his hammy . Leroy looks at me and shakes his head . “Dad you should just quit”. “That’s it Leroy , today was a special day . You just saw me play competitive sport for the 1st and last time and you had your 1st poo at school . It doesn’t get any better “.