The School Picnic

Every year the view ( elementary)school has an introductory picnic. It’s a good idea . A good way for parents and kids alike to reacquaint an introduce . It’ll be the 1st year that we go. Emma is away with her Aussie mates Deb and Justine , so it’s the boys and I . Yes , Tex will be here , and for the reasoning ? Let’s just say discipline.. , grounded , but under close supervision for seriously being a fucking …. !!! Pain in the arse !! Anyway , it all adds up to me being very thirsty , and not for some healthy kombucha feel good stuff . I need something stiff . Alas I’m driving , the .08 limit only allows me to get loose and the idea that booze busses actually exist here , makes it tempting to be bad , but no I’m in Hermosa Beach and I might get a reputation as being irresponsible. Better not . Still I grab the boys and head to the supermarket. I need some beer , chips , blue cups and ,I’m ready . ” Dad what am I gonna sit on ” , Leroy says . Ohh fuck , I’ve forgotten the blanket. I can see it now . We ( I ) turn up with a 6 pack , potato chips in a small esky and nothing else . Shit , i better buy a blanket or towel or something so we are not obvious . We settle on an American flag towel . Never thought I’d do it but at $12.99 I’m all over it . We’re there . Leroy’s freaked out . ” Dad your not allowed beer in there , there’s security and you’l embarrass me if you get drunk . ” ” Cut it out Leroy , it’s me ? the king of Mornington, what’s to worry ? ” We arrive . There’s scouts , adventure guides , school fundraisers , a young girl band ( pretty good too ),guess the lollies in the jar and all that feel good stuff . We skirt round the back . Leroy and Tex want me to hide out behind everyone . I look around at one table and picnic set up and laugh to myself . Carrots , celery , fruit and a giant barrel of Kombucha . Geezus can we not loosen up and pretend to be perfect just occasionally , even if it is a school event . I know what I’m looking for and find her : Megan. I knew she wouldn’t let me down . The sun glowing through her golden locks with that well used white sipper cup . Amen Megan . There’s alcohol being consumed . Before long there’s a small posse of us having a couple of beers whilst shooting the breeze . Even had Hamish the Kiwi doing his regular comedy serenade ( he seriously has a pilot series that he’s trying to sell to Hollywood ) . Yep , even had the American flag around my shoulders ……. yeah I know …,.. really wrong . Moral of the story : salt n vinegar chips and a few beers won’t hurt a school picnic , even with blue sipper cups To anyone back home I’m sorry , this image is disturbing