Xcaret

Never heard of it have you ? Xel ha , Xnotes ,Xplor are others . An hour north of Cancun lies Coastline rich with emerald waterways and dense jungle and ancient ruins , but not for long . Adventure parks are springing up all long this piece of coastline . With that comes total commercialism . Today we headed to xcaret . These parks aren’t cheap at around $140 a head , but what they have is nearly everything . Yesterday was a nearly 16 hour day ; starting with pickup at 730 am and eventually drop off at11pm . Like Xel ha you’ve got to be ready to expose your wears . It’s swimsuits ,booties or thongs ( flip flops over here ) and sunscreen . There’s acres of flesh on show , both good and ..,..ah well .., . With the temperature at around 28 Celsius and humidity up in the 70s it’s sweat , sunscreen and chafing for the next 10 hours , as well as constant wet feet and salt water drying on the body . Yesterday I walked 22000 steps in the park alone . The day started with a kilometre long lazy river through manmade and natural caves . We had flippers and life vests on helping us propel through uncomfortable masses of people . I had to carry Leroy the whole way as he was cold and a bit overwhelmed by the crowded water . The current cajoled us through tropical jungle , exotic macaws ,toucans and some beautiful rock formations. It took us 40 minutes to get to the end . Tex and I then hustled to get to our jet boat booking . This was an extra cost of $59 a head . 360 rolls , high speed lift off and submersions ( breaking hard forcing the boat to dive nose 1st submarine style ) were next . The whole experience was compared in Spanish . There are moments when walking around you become self conscious . You’re in swimsuits and nothing else ; any type of accessory is a problem . It has to be carried or it could disappear, even sunglasses , although as the day went on it felt less likely . It feels as if you’re near naked , dripping wet and uncouth . The staff are all dressed and at times they surely must be thinking ” what the fuck are these people doing ? It does feel like the hispanics are more comfortable in showing off their bodies , and really this is how it should be . Eating in the restaurant in your g banger is no big deal , just cover it up in see through mesh , that way you don’t draw attention to it ….. I think ? Emma and Leroy swam with dolphins and had a ball , that was another extra cost of US $70 a head . The cost is building . We had an authentic Mexican all you can eat buffet washed down with a huge margarita. Did I tell you I love margaritas? I love’m . Butterfly enclosures , rainforests , waterfalls , aquariums , snorkelling , arts , horse shows , para sailing , jet skiing , swimming with rays and sharks and more …. were all to be experienced . On a side note I did feel that the enclosure of wild animals for our entertainment was slightly disturbing. I know I can’t talk as a westerner as we’ve exploited this area before but you really get a sense that we are in a developing country that has a bit of a ‘Wild West ‘ approach . Emma and I would often laugh at the lapse safety and the potential for ‘real problems ‘ that back in Australia would quickly be hosed down . The last 2 hours was spent watching a large Mexican style stage show in a massive open air amphitheater. We were seated and fed 7 courses while the show went on and on and on . No really the 1st 90 minuted were really entertaining , but after a long sweaty day and 7 courses of very good food we were literally stuffed . The Mexicans don’t do it by half and Xcaret has sat me on my arse today . I think it’s time to lay around the pool , rub my expanded girth and think about that 1st beer . I’ve just put a pair of old board shorts on that never fitted me , but hey welcome back big boys you’re now nice and snug . I’d say midday should start it all off again . Cheers Excaret , that was another big day that the Howies from down under have conquered.