Gday dingoes , , dare I say it …Here we go again .As of 1pm today we are nearly back in total lockdown . Parks and beaches are the only things left . The virus numbers are leaping off the chart . Schools will officially be open for distance learning only , for the rest of the year ! It might be time to get back on the grog . As I’ve got older I’ve become more interested in left field matters , namely astrology . I know , I know . You probably think it’s bullshit , but hay I think there’s something in it . Anyways , without forcing things down your throat the astrological charts are not painting a pretty picture for the rest of 2020 . As if we didn’t already sense it . She also doesn’t look too pretty for 2021 either . Shit , it’s time to hold on tight , it’s gonna be a rocky ride .
You know ,I was trying to think about 2020 and how it felt . It brought me back 30 years prior when we were in the early middle stages of the recession . Of course I was only 20 with no responsibilities.I remember those days fondly for the good times . Playing footy , surfing , going out regularly with hardly any money , but some how getting home drunk . Socially it was strong , cause we were all in it together . It felt similar earlier in the year . We all just said “ fuck it , who’s drinking tonight ? “ And we did . This year also reminds me of the days playing footy at Tyabb and the early days at Mornington . You didn’t look too far ahead , as nothing was certain , but you could always have a few beers , or carpool to the surf , or wait for your turn to shout when your dole money came in . It’s been a long year , and fuck it’s gonna be a gruelling marathon yet .
I remember the days when all the boys would be at the Royal back bar listening to a live band . Dodgy and I would be primed after footy training , downing the old Carlton Draught ( beer), sleazing our way in on anything that would move . You’d get home at 2am totally roasted and then it came …….fuck no . The early morning phone call at 6am . Mums trying to wake me out of a deep grog induced coma . “ What is it “ , I’d ask . “ Keith Callaghan’s on the phone , he wants to know if you could come in for the day .” Ohh , fark no , please no , no , no , I can’t do it ……. ahhh “Ok , tell him I’ll be there “ , I’d tell mum . “ Oh and he told me to tell you to pick up Dodgy from his house too . He says he’s also called his mum as well .” You always said yes , it was crucial drinking money for the weekend . This is where those days remind of this year . We would get to the Rabbatoir just before 7 , I’d drive the short 3km journey , no doubt still over the alcohol limit . It was usually freezing , still dark . You’d be thinking …’how the fuck am I going to get through this ? ‘And to go back on what I just said ….yes I did say rabbatoir , no typo there . When rabbits roamed across Australia they were a vermin that was to be eradicated ( an impossible task ) . They were shot and trucked in from the outback in refrigerated trucks to be butchered at a little abattoir out the back of our joint. We were to get $60 cash for working 8 hours doing all sorts of gross shit to dead frozen rabbits .Geezus it was tough , especially on a hangover , which was always the conditions we worked under . The smell of game animals , the fur , the frozen scent of wild dead rabbits . Buckle up Howie, she’s gonna be a long day . Getting through the 1st hour without throwing up was an endurance test . It started easy , just unloading the trucks with rabbits , hares and yes the occasional wild cat as a joke from the hunters . We just rolled them into the refrigerated back room . Then you were assigned your job . “ Howie , your gonna go into the skinning room where you’ll be just chopping bunny heads for the day ,”Crossy would say with a laugh . Two guys would simultaneously skin the rabbits , throw them onto a large metal bench where I would then grab each one ,swing my tomahawk and chop there heads off ……..all fucking day . After about your six hundredth decapitation your hand would be killing you . Your hand would be cold , the handle would leave red marks on your hand , even though wearing a rubber water proof glove . At the end of the day you’d have chopped anywhere from 800 to 1000 bunny heads clean off ….or mostly clean off . Sometimes they were hacked off . There’d be no masturbating with that hand for the next few days . It was tough , but you’d grind through and walk away happy . I got this job quite a bit on the first few times I was called in . Then the work went cold for a while . I was happy not be needed “Fuck that for a job ,”we’d say .
Then the work came back …”Howie ,we need you to come in .” Fuck , here we go again . Just when you thought it was over ,you’re going back in there . It started the same ,with the unloading of the rabbits ,then I started to move towards the head chopping room . “ Nah , mate . I’ve got a better job for ya , you just have to go into the main room and help the girls .” Sweet , I thought . But sweet it wasn’t . “ All you and Dodgy have to do is put the glove on , grab the bunny off the hook from the circulating rail and just shove your hand in through the hole where it’s head was and just rip out it’s guts . Easy peazy fellas .” Dodgy and I looked at each other with a shake of the head ………Brutal . Within 2 hours the arm, fingers and wrist were humming , not to mention the sight of guts , gizzards , hearts and lungs squashed into your fist . Your fingers and knuckles would grind along the frozen rabbits rib cage , sometimes breaking bones , catching your fingers on the jagged break .The gloves weren’t enough to keep your hands cushioned .You’d look at your watch and think ‘I can’t make it , I’ve still got 5 hours to go . ‘Of course Dodgy couldn’t go on as his arm was in too much pain . He got moved in next to the girls to just cleaning the carcass up . I was left alone , now having to do double the load . The bunnies just kept on coming and I just kept on gouging . It was a long grinding , painful day , but I made it …somehow without quitting or throwing up .
Anyhow , I think the 1st lstage lockdown might’ve been tough but guess what ? It might be time to get ready for stage 2 . Chopping heads wasn’t easy but ripping guts outta bunnies was nasty . Gyms , salons , restaurants, indoor malls ,… anything indoor is out of bounds in California .Now for the outdoors . It’s been hot , the fans are on at night , the feet hang out from under the doona . The beaches are offering a retreat , but for how long ? 2 weeks ago I saw my 1st shark after 40 years in the water . Now it feels like the sharks are circling . Anyway dingoes , enough talking about animals . I think we are in for a tough stretch . It’s time to hang tough ,grind away and why not have a good time too . Let’s drink to a fucked up year .
aussiehowieinla 