Diplomacy

Before we get to the sight seeing stuff there are some early observations that are starting to hold true . If you’ve got a bladder like an acorn as I have you’ve got to strategise carefully . Toilets are hard to come by , often cost 1 Euro , can be un operational , don’t have toilet seats and in city areas are nearly non existent ….so far. Puglia was much better than Naples and the Amalfi Coast . I didn’t dare touch a drop of any liquid once I left our hotel room , often spanning 5-6 hours so as not to be forced into panic , one hand holding old mate whilst feet involuntarily dancing in small steps . It’s a conundrum when at nearly every direction there is a plethora of cheap dining and drinking options , often with no visual sign of toilets . I find it tortuous as the one thing I’m happy to spend my money on is eating and drinking .

As I mentioned previously hospitality is aloof if not inconsistent. On one hand the Italians can be be the best of hosts , other times they couldn’t care less . When I inexplicably lost my phone in a torrential downpour exiting Positano we immediately located it as our ferry approached . I desperately scurried back to where our life 360 app pinged it , at a cafe some 50 meters away . I asked an older guy who was cleaning the tables where we just sat but he dismissed me despite my polite but desperate pleading . I then went to the cafe counter and asked if they had picked up a phone . They said they had and the waiter knew where it was but I would have to wait as he was busy . I look over my shoulder noticing the last of the travellers boarding our ferry in the rain ,but old mate was happy to wipe down tables and then commence to brew a coffee . “ Please “ , I plead . Explaining that I’ll miss my ferry ……. But nope . The waiter / barista ignores my plea . There is only one person in front of me waiting for his coffee but I’ll wait no matter what. Ferry missed ! I walk back forlornly, still without that damned phone as my waiter friend walks away without acknowledging me . I’ve fucked this one up , completely and hopelessly . Emma is drenched as she patiently waits at the boarding dock looking at the ferry chugging away …and I still didn’t have my phone .I feel totally stupid . We drag our cases back over the cobblestones which now look like stones in a river rapid ….and then it pours again .Monsoonal ….completely and utterly drenched .. I go back with Emma , both of us looking like pathetic drowned rats . Meekly , we ask if there had been a phone picked up . Of course there was and it is handed back to us with that typical Italian smile ,glint in eye and nod of the head . We ask if we can shelter under his awning he but says no. Thank you very much . When told we had to repurchase our tickets I laughed . Of course we do . Fortunately the lady at the kiosk is more than empathetic and reprints our tickets at no cost. . We catch that next ferry to Salerno to pick up our hire car , fearing we are now an hour late , but alas our car still hasn’t arrived. It will be some hour and half or more . All that lost phone pain and drenching was not even necessary.

After having a wonderful lunch as per usual . The food and the service around food have been 1st rate ; we cruise back to our rental car provider . I’ve scanned maps looking for toilets in Salerno to find there are apparently no public toilets in a 200 thousand people city . I’m sure this is not accurate but what do you do. I’ll just ask the guy at Budget Rentals as surely he’ll allow me to relieve myself considering our car is 2 and 1/2 hours late for pickup . “ No sir you cannot use our toilet . Maybe go next door and buy a coffee he may let you use his toilet “. …Ahhh , thanks mate . Ciao

I’m under no illusion that things are different over here . The things that are a given in Australia are not as valued . It’s a busy populated country swarming with tourists from all over the world that often can’t speak a word of Italian ( me ) . It’s very busy . No one will move out of their way for you on paths or lines or even on the road , It doesn’t matter if you’re struggling up a hill with suitcases in the hot sun or pouring rain . They’re not moving for you . You can be delayed on a bus or in a terminal and there’s probably not even going to be announcement let alone an apology . In fact right now as I write this we are learning that our luggage belt is broken at the carousel , after our flight left 30 minutes late without any explanation . It looks like we’ll miss our connection from Milan to Lake Como and yet not one official has explained anything to anyone , it was Emma who sought out the problem and to then pass the news on to everyone else . Of course she would . When international travelling I’m learning the hard way that you’ve gotta toughen up , have your wits about you and not expect any fanfare just cause you’re an Aussie . The locals will generally help you and have done several times . … And don’t lose your fucking phone ……..Arrividerci. PS , By the way we are on our train to Lake Como after a desperate down to the minute push that has the cortisol at peak level .