Right ,I’ve got a couple of things in the pipe works .There’s mixing with people of common interest , you know the people that keep you young . The lawn bowling club grows bigger by the day. The invite to join and roll the balls over the Santa Ana couch with the silver brigade feels like a fait accompli . Barb, Walter,Ted and Nancie , I think I ‘l be seeing you soon . Before that though comes the 1st chapter of my social network .The Hermosa Beach historical society. Yep , I slipped into the local historical museum of Hermosa Beach . Before I could turn around and escape I was politely accosted and dragged through the joint. A lovely dear gave me the complete rundown in just on 30 minutes , about 25 longer than what it would’ve taken me if I was on my own . The result being that they’ve got all my contact details and are very keen for me to join their club .Of course I’m soft as butter and said that could be good. In November my host is keen for me to come to one of their quarterly functions , where she’l present a forum on jazz and swing dancing and will then give lessons . Right up my alley.Next Thursday will be one of my 1st gatherings where one of the ladies from the society will take me and a group of others for a bike ride through Hermosa Beach . It will be a moving historical tour on wheels . After that it might be tea and scones with the old ducks , you beauty. I finally think I’m finding a group with a common theme , oldies . They’re retired and have time , yep I’m going to be the young one . Might even get offers to be the toyboy… Cool. 

I’m living in the land of the free . Once you knuckle down and decide to take in information from the bigger newspapers you realise that this country offers up too much choice for free. As an Aussie I find that the laws surrounding guns over here are extraordinary. I’m laughing with my eyes wide open as I peel through the many layers of gun rights . The detail that you have to wade through is incredible . Deregulation is big here and it has its benefits , but with guns it has become illogical. I’ve taken a very lazy approach and just jotted down a few things from the ‘LA times ‘editorial , but I’m sure you’ll still shake your head at this back home .Heres a few spin offs that gun ownership has created . A preemption State allows you to openly carry guns . So what? The race demonstration violence in Charlottesville that the media attacked Donny boy over , well most of the white supremacists and a lot of others in that brawl were heavily armed . It’s miraculous that it didn’t end up in a bloodbath .They want to ban guns at public rallies now as a result. Good luck with that .Theres your ‘stand your ground’ law that half the states in America have adopted . This law can be used as a self defence claim for justifiable homicide . In other words you can shoot and kill someone if you feel you are totally threatened .Florida under Jeb Bush was the 1st to bring this in . Jeb lost out to Donny for the Presidency.Gun lovers are actually running this country right now . You see ,’stand your ground law ‘ has created an 85% increase in justifiable homicide . Nice. Before that you had the’Castle doctrine’ which many states have . This is your right to defend your property with deadly force. In Nevada two people were shot dead in a vacant rental property whilst they were laying on the floor. The 73 year old land lord found them squatting I presume and thought it justifiable that he kill them with his shot gun . Fair enough old boy , the law says you are well within your rights . They are taught all about their constitution from an early age , even this year I sent back a video of Leroy in grade 1 singing a song about it .The 2nd amendment, the right to bare arms . It’s crazy . Occasionally I ‘l just look around while I’m in the shopping mall with hundreds of other people and just wonder who is actually armed and whether they’ve had a good day or not . 

We are fortunate to live in an area where the kids can roam the streets. I’m sure throughout LA other kids get the same privelage , as long as their gang affiliated. Crime is almost unheard of in the South Bay bubble.Occasionally someone will get their bike knocked off or their car broken into , but generally it’s petty crime. Tex is 12 going on 16 . He and his mates will gather together in the afternoon into the night and sometimes you won’t see them until 10 pm .The other parents are aware of this , infact most of the Southbay and their schools are too. The nights are warm , you’ve got parks connected by interwoven path networks and the kids homes spread throughout .On dusk this place closes in , becoming  a labrynth that the kids no back to front. They’l venture to its borders to hit McDonald’s or 7 11 . They lie on the major highway , Sepulveda Way. Once you cross the other side of this road you’ve got another couple of miles of sanctuary before it spreads its fingers into the real world of La . The kids know to stay on the beachside of Sepulveda, They’ve all got mobile phones and as i’l explain in another blog down the track , they’ve got finance. In a weird way it reminds of the good old days in Tanti Park when you knew the kids could roam the streets in safety . We were protected because no one wanted to come in ,bar the cops Ofcourse .Tonight Tex had 3 mates stay over and it’s common place throughout this extraordinary long break that the kids will stay at each others place and then roam the streets into the night. It’s 815 in the morning and the boys are in the spa after getting 5 hours sleep in our lounge room . The following video is another hard hitter on Nicky . Nicky boy lives on the strand ,​one of the most  sought after pieces of real estate in all of LA.

You know your not living in Melbourne when you see the major council in your area apologising for mistakes .A council that is willing to implement a system that will alert you by phone that your parking time is up . They estimate that the loss in parking fine revenue will flow into millions . This is LA and of course we live in a place where your civil liberties are vehemently upheld .Melbourne city council and the other councils of Melbourne would shudder at the thought of giving up there means of entrapment. The bottom line would be threatened .No overseas study trips next year . On The Southbay where we live there is a coastal road that slides under the airport and connects through to Venice and Santa Monica.It can be a bit of a shortcut not unlike Beach road outside of beach days .The council in its wisdom thought it a good idea to reduce the road in both directions from 2 lanes to 1. Giving our bikers a whole lane to themselves in both directions .The route now is totally stuffed as it is in permanent gridlock .The public criticism has been relentless . Traffic is now pushed onto the surrounding roads and freeway that skirts the airport. Not good. The local paper’s letters section is filled with scathing criticism of the councils pro bike agenda. Just last week the LA city council made a public apology and is now in the process of ripping down all the barriers and returning the lanes back to the cars .All those middle age bike knobs will have to get back on their bike lane and it will probably be these guys that will get a quicker commute by car to their office in Venice beach. This is LA , they love cars and traffic and funnily enough they see themselves as greenies too but the public does have a voice . They simply wouldn’t allow a council to make decisions that run rough shod over the publics want . No nanny state here , no governing on what should be best for us , no treating us as a means of making yourselves important . No , do your job for us ,not yourselves .  The councils are not a law unto themselves like somewhere else I know.

It came , we saw , I yawned , it’s over . The solar eclipse of the sun in the USA .The last time it was here was 1979. I thought it was going to get dark . I expected to hear screams and gunshots echoing through the dark and that Donald Trump had declared North Korea the 51st state of the US. No it didn’t even get gloomy , it was more like your dull Melbourne day . It actually cooled down to a chilly 18 or 19 degrees . I stared at intently and I reckon 60% of the sun disappeared . I’m still waiting for my eye sight to come back as everything’s blurry and I think I’ve got blinkers on but she’l be right by tomorrow ,I hope . Ofcourse it got cloudy today for the 1st time in 2 weeks but there it is , the 1st eclipse in California for ages . North of California in the state or Oregon it totally blacked out . Sammy the seal thought it was cool , he was throwing his brekkie around right as the eclipse got started . ​

This is the dog capital , maybe of the world . Dog walking is actually a profession here .A lot of people don’t have much space but it doesn’t stop dog ownership.As I’ve said before , the site of pet shops , pet restaurants , doggy daycare , veterinary clinics is ridiculous but they all seem to be doing business.Im not kidding when I say I think it would be easier to get your pet in for medical treatment more than yourself . I can vouch for that (the ear has came good just as I went off the antibiotics). This is a place where pet ownership is maybe a bit…… different. Tex stayed at his mates house recently . After extracting what little information about the night and his friends family ,I got some funny info.They have 3 dogs ; a pitbull , a poodle cross and a terrier all in their yard less house. The little terrier was shaved down as he’d been attacked by a ………… bobcat ! After having an argument about the likelihood of this being factual and going through the detail of Tex’s account ,it’s probably the truth . You are allowed to have bobcats as pets in California. They must be bought as bred kittens . Who would of thought that your dog could actually get sliced and diced by a bobcat on your daily walk , and they had a goddam pit bull with them . Unfortunately I couldn’t get the complete story from Tex as he is at that age where any questioning is met with a hostility .  I still get a good laugh out of the idea that you can own exotic cats as pets and your poor old dog might not be top dog anymore .  All I can picture is little scrappsy was doing the yapping and thought he’d show his big brothers how tough he is and launched at our little puss in boots (more like talons) who I assume was also on his lead .Scrapsy quickly got turned into sliced pastrami . Poor little fucker got taught a lesson by bobsy . Pit bull and poods must’ve froze and said your in it alone scrapsy .  Poor scrapsy

Wow , the doomsdayers might just have their day of reckoning . The sun will disappear for 2 hours on Monday morning . Of course we’ve experienced a total eclipse of the heart , oh shit I mean sun in Australia and nothing happened other than it getting dark for a bit . Here , it’s the perfect day to get some business done that you know , that person that you didn’t like or that problem that you’d like to go away , just happens to be acted upon .I reckon Compton and those beautiful areas of LA are gonna shed a lot of led.Fuck it’s gonna be crazy in the States on Monday. Now you can actually do permanent damage to the eyes on Monday by looking at the eclipse .  This could be Armageddon or worse.Everyone could go blind (not me )and I fear those deadly trees might spawn and kill us all off. The triffids , yep , one of the great mini series based on a true prediction could be here in the states and not Britain .I reckon we’re fucked and it’s the day of the triffids and not the rebirth of Christ which is upon us.You probably think I’m smoking some triffid bud right now but this joint has the most guns , the most crime , the most UFO sightings ,the most crazies and the most big people in the world and it’s run by the Don . It’s gonna be mad.I’m telling yas , don’t be surprised if that mini series based on true fact in the future finally arrives . The Day of the Fuckn Triffids is upon us . 

They’re good at it . Are they better than us ?Yes they are, but there is a proviso .Our best comfortably sits along side their best . It’s just the volume . The brewers here are prolific , and I know your going to say it’s the same in Australia and maybe it is when it comes to the ratio of brewers to population . As per usual I don’t research these statements , but I still suspect their might be more brewers per capita here . What does it all mean ? Variety and mass . There’s a lot to choose from and not just in your Dan Murphy type set up . Prices are already low but when competition is so fierce the boutiques can’t rely on quality alone . They’ve gotta be affordable. I’m surprised at the palate of the Californian beer drinker . There’s no Bud , Coors, Stella or even Corona ,it’s big hopped , biting , bust out the doors type of beer . It was pale ale but now it’s IPAs and double IPAs . It’s the big , gripping beer that holds and climbs all the way back into your jowls. It’s confronting at first but I’ve come around to it pretty quickly . I love it . I look for it and need it . I always thought that you couldn’t beat an icy corona or peroni on a hot day . Once upon a time it was VB or Carlton Draught . Now I see that a big IPA really does have some thirst quenching properties , it holds longer and doesn’t get sickly . Drink it on an empty stomach or without eating too much , while watching the sun go down and you’l want it again and again . They also have a fondness for the Belgian wheat style of beer , which their brewers replicate a lot .  I actually like this when it’s a bit cooler as it has to be very cold or it quickly gets sickly otherwise . There’s a long way to go in making judgements on beer , but i’l say it’s quarter time and it’s IPA out in front lead by its power forward , Golden Road’s wolf pup at 8%. A superb drop that might be my new all time favourite . Check out my quarter time better players so far There’s a couple on the bench I’ve got up my sleeve . Check these mad arse beers

I’ve been barking up this tree for a while but I still don’t get it. It’s meant to be the alternative , the stuff you eat because you know it’s healthier . You’ve trained yourself for years and now your fond of it , your not going back . That is until you move to the states. I’ve been drumming away about their use of sweetener in bread . It’s fuckn horrible. No really , they’ve got their hands on one of the most simplest of recipes and brainwashed 400 million people that this is how it is . The biggest loser in all this , apart from your waistline is the healthy alternative .Brown bread is not to be eaten , they have right royally made this healthy alternative into one of the worse tasting things you are likely to eat. And I can tell you that is a big call because they can eat some terrifyingly bad shit . The big thing in your mass produced bread here is the claim that they don’t use high fructose corn starch , thank god as it would put your need to bake cakes out of business.I’m not a big eater of bread like I used to be , it’s wraps as an alternative but I love a couple of wholemeal or whole grain pieces of toast with eggs or tomato or just good old Vegemite. Now it just tastes wrong . Sour dough or just white bread if you have to . Just think about it , when was the last time you ordered a brown doughnut. Yeah i’l have it wholemeal with the 9 grains and seeds variety , thanks . Disgusting.The reason we eat it brown is cause we’re trying to be healthy . When you come for a Holliday don’t bother ordering brown bread unless you know they bake it themselves , sweetener free. The brown donut is only good if it has a whole in the middle with chocolate icing . It’s doing me a favour as I’m eating less bread than ever and that can’t hurt the skin folds.

Back out to Santa Monica I head , this time with my little helper , Leroy. Same again , where here early and no ones here . Today there’s no nerves .I’m concerned that I’m not worried or anxious , even popped out a couple of yawns . I’ve been here and havn’t done this before. Sure enough a group of young kids are here to be met by a couple of young kids who will induct us . We line up ,get our video taken by phone and it’s all pretty low key . I start off well but get a bit shaky at the end but it was ok . We do a bit of general stuff on the walk procedure. As per cliche you’ve got that one person who asks questions that have just been answered and explained by the hosts. This bloke was your young version of Tom Hanks . Mate give it a rest so we can all get out of here for Christ sake . And that’s it , well not quite. They do a background check , hmmmm , could be a hiccup .