Shit I’m getting bored of this but looks like I’ve gotta get out there again .Didnt have to get out of bed or even look on line for a surf report as Em has done that for me on her morning walk.Tells me she can see waves and guys looking .well that gives me an extra 5 mins in bed to watch the news while I drink my coffee.I need every bit of recovery I can get as I’m getting a bit stiff . Might organise a massage after the water therapy session.Oh and she tells me my social security numbers arrived in the mail meaning I can officially work .Fuck I’m hiding under the doona now 

Another morning another saltwater therapy session . Yes priorities have to be made ,sacrifices met .Off to the cinema to see guardians of the galaxy for the kids .But since I went surfing it was time that Emma and the kids did some shopping .Just what I love ,mall surfing and then watching kids movies .Love lookn at multiple shoe shops and seeing row upon fucking row of nikes . I’m thinking I might need to drop into purple smoke to release genie from his bottle .And then the previews : Thor ,Wonder Woman ,Spider-Man ,kinsmsan and  pirates of the Caribbean .Havnt we seen these before?Yep this is Hollywood just dum us down . Anyway got home and had a few beers,watched the kardashians and dropped into a coma .No genie needed with kimmy and her clan to kill of the brain cells . Good night

Ok I thought I should tell you a more deatailed story of Hermosa.1st of All we are about 30 km southwest of LA and about 8 km southwest of LAX . Close to both locations but traffic means an hour +++ to LA and 20 mins + to LAX. Emma works in Elsugundo which is real close to the airport . There’s a lot of big business located near the airport which helps push the average income well above the US average.So we are 1 of 3 beach cities (towns) located south of the major port .  On the other side you’ve got Venice beach ,Santa Monica and then stretching into the hillside coast to the north you’ve got Malibu.Now if this was Melbourne you’d be within an hour or less to get to any of these locations. But this joint is a city that has a big part of its identity entangled in its love for cars hence the traffic is mad .The climate here is a positive, it averages around 23 to 28 in the summer and 18 +in the winter.Hermosa is a densely packed little locale that is undulating and pretty green . It is  anglo dominated and wealthy . Property averages 2.5 million+ for a place with no front or back yard . Space is a premium .Rents  astronomical . Yep we are copping it there .Its a very cool place with a heap of bars cafes and restaurants . We happened to be placed here with our temporary accommodation but now we don’t want to leave . That’s the trap. For once you spread 5 km inland it gets ugly real quick .I couldn’t last 2 years living out there .It reminds me of Doveton meets Morewell and it just spreads into the horizon . But that’s where everybody lives . And of course there’s the beaches . A bit like the gold coast with these crazy big jettys and piers . Surprisingly decent surf and with a whole workforce assigned to up keeping the coast .Youve got a bike and walkway that runs up the entire beachfront which attracts a kaleidoscope of outfits (or lack of)bikes ,dogs ,rollerbladers and fitness freaks . Also some celebrity and sports stars are rumoured to live here .We saw Blake Griffen in our local park last week . Just you tube him and you’ll no more .The Beach Boys ,the delinquents and black flag started here .Yep if your ever here on Holliday Hermosa is quintessential California and we’d love to see you because this is a great place to stay . And it’s the perfect start or leave point because your so close to the airport . No excuses !

Ok I’ve enjoyed this little blog and I admit it is pretty self indulgent . I know I can get away with a bit because I don’t have to see anyone face to face. Who gives a shit if your  not going to get embarrassed when you run into someone .And it is Californian to wanna be famous and as most people know I already have a physically big head . So being a big head is water off a ducks back .In general this place is sure entertaining and it provides a lot talk about but if they knew how good Australian life really was they’d all want to move over .And that truly is something that gives you confidence . Cos bring an  Aussie keeps you grounded and it gives you a heightened skill to spot a wanker and there’s plenty here .   Ps there’s plenty that are pretty good too 

Yep .Finally a real taste of America .Im bored so I go with em to take Leroy to some trampoline joint. Only did it cause I felt guilty as I had a beer at 230 and new I wanted more. Anyway this joint was fuckn packed.A million kids and some big humans and I mean massive .This is where Jerry Springer must do his mail out for auditions . You’ve never seen so much  arse on so few a human .Any way I figured we go out for dinner (again ) and there it is ,all the evidence I need on my plate .I ordered from the appetiser section for $19 and got 6 crumbed prawns, 5 sticky chicken pieces ,4 tuna tacos and 4 little spring roll things .Crazy ! Portion sizes are ridiculous no wonder it’s the land of the big.Im laying down now ,feel a little sick in my tum tum 

Well been surfing ,had brunch at ‘Gum tree’ (where else but a Aussie cafe )now back at the apartment .This is where it gets to me .No lawns or gardens, no dog to walk ,no kids sports yet ,no newspapers to read ,no football to watch but I have a little collection in the fridge which keeps calling out to me .This is the trap .Now on a serious not there are some temptations . Like there really is a big boutique beer culture here .And the various smoke houses . What are they all about ? Now it’s a matter of time before I’m going to have to do some serious investigation ,maybe put the body through some guinea pig like testing to just you know make sure that I stay busy and report on what works and what doesn’t . 

Friday night . Emma drove ,we took tex to a party in Torrance (15mins) . Great! Ok let’s go out to dinner ,maybe back in Hermosa with its cool collection of restaurants and bars just off the beach . No EJ prefers a walk around Maceys getting a present for tomorrow’s kids party (yep it’s started already)and then getting something to eat there . Fuck ! Just what I felt like after a big day .And with an Olympic shopper  who cuts her teeth in the field . Hmmm starting to brood , maybe sook a bit .could be soaking in the vibes while getting pissed back at Hermosa. Anyway after to going to ‘build a bear’,NYXand Disney world we found somewhere to eat.LazyDog family restaurant (fuckn hate franchise family restaurants). There big over here.Anyway what’s starts bad can end good .After getting through the cheese fondue ((shocked .it was real good) I got hit by an18 rib sticky sweet pork road train .Fuckn Hooj ! Left 1 rib behind between us . Yep they serve big here folks . See sometimes it can get better .just need a lay down and a beer while I watch the basketball  

Ok .From 4am this morning when the phone kept beeping I knew the saints must of been going well .Thats good. After raging about the poor news content finally something else ; there’s been a spate of great whites seen along the coast with an attack and detailed coverage with video footage .Maybe not that good. But fuck it I say and after the kids went to school off I went for a bit of hydro therapy off manhatten beach .Yep as I was about to head out all alone a couple fins popped out and I thought I was having an immediate enima but just dolphins .There big dolphins over here  .  You’ve always got company .Wouldve thought that they would have eaten the ocean dry with all the people and seafood restaurants ..Then ,you know doin it all tough and that with all my daily chores I thought I better drop into Wholefoods and pick me self up some beer to reinvigorate the body. And to top it off when I get home one of my all time favourites is on tv .Jerry Springer.  Yep the day has got better and it’s Friday as well .Might even get a massage  ,just a bit stiff You know how it is .

And another thing what’s news .?Over  here it’s the freeways ,traffic accidents and shootings .Nothing else! Got excited as they went to across about a surfer who was rescued by helicopter  .But nothing   Said he will never surf again . Showed him being winched up . No elaboration ,what the fuck happened? Same with the girl who was bit by a shark .Did a cross said she was still in a coma .Thats it !No storey .Nofamily members no experts no shark cull nothing! Oh and back to JZ and Beyoncé and that baby bump  now that’s big news  we ‘l spend 5 mins on that . News is violent crime, traffic,weather (don’t get it  it rarely changes) and the big one.   Celebrity. 

Ok sport is big here .Basketball play offs are dominating the tv and I’ve found I’m watching it every night .Gotta admit I’m coming around to it .Baseball  not yet . Ice hockey , possibly the worst tv spectacle . College football  not yet . NFL will  be all over it. Car chases and shootings  yep get my fill every morning .Im happy not to get to that live. LA life gets in the way . Sport is not tribal here hence none of there teams are ever contenders . It’s a transient place where people would rather chase the kardashians around or get excited about super hero sequels (please put out something original)or line up to get Starbucks to get the unicorn frappe .And I’m told kids sports get cancelled if it rains . Yep they like being fit here and if it comes to havn the best rig there champions there teams not so . Probably because this place is truly about the ‘me me’.Get your self famous even if you have to shoot someone ,shit why not